Thursday, October 14, 2010

Curiosity & Embarassment !!

Recollecting ..

A couple of weeks back , at the Delhi airport,  I witnessed a very interesting and hilarious incident.

In the men’s room a passenger walked in followed  by a small girl ,less than 2 years old .
And this little one was extremely curious . Most likely it would be the first time that she has entered a men’s room. And she promptly launched on a inspection tour of all the gents who were seriously facing the wall in one orderly row .

She would go near each one of those standing gent , observe their performance and look at them directly in their face !. And I could observe the extreme discomfort of these individuals and especially some of the older ones who were squirming in their pants and trying to desperately finish off their act fast !!

The entire episode lasted for probably a  minute . I wished I had a video camera to capture those candid moments .

This is one incident I am sure every one of those present will remember for a long long time .
And I for one, will never forget !!

Krish..
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Hospital ! Dread another day !!

Waiting out at the hospital reception hall
Sitting on a uncomfortable chill steel chair in the narrow second row
Uncomfortably adjusting my knees each time someone walks past
Faces worried , anxious, worriedly anxious, pained , suffering, tired and some sheer exhausted .
Not a great place to spend an entire morning – I Bet !!

A big queue at the sample collection counter
Followed by a two hour wait for the report
Continuous stream of patient
And huge volumes of blood samples
Its fever time , its Dengue time in Bangalore – You Bet !!

16 went in, 7 came out through the main ward entrance
That’s is 23 a minute , 1380 an hour
And the guard at the entrance finding it very difficult to convince people
That one pass allows just one visitor – not three !!
And its not even peak time – I Bet !!

A bunch of young folks land up – very active and excited
Genuine patients ?? Probably not
New recruits coming for medical screening
Before joining their new jobs
Must be at HP , IBM or Cisco – You Bet!!

Then an elderly trio walk in
Heavy set balding man in-lead, followed by a thin bespectacled husband and his stocky wife in tow
With travel bags – its evident they come direct for the Bangalore railway station .
No brownie points for guessing this time
Anxious to check out their new born grand infant – I Bet ! and Double it !!

An Innova rolls up at the entrance , a very old man steps out
The helpful attendant rolls out the wheel chair – but not for him
But for his very frail and emaciated wife in a bright pink gown
Most people smile and greet them
Unfortunate frequent visitor – You Bet !

And as they roll past me
I see the wafer thin wife look up at her husband
And give the same loving smile she probably gave him 60 years back when they went dating at Cubbon Park
And the husband smiles back clearly indicating
You will walk back perfectly fine this time too – I Bet - and Double it !!

I walk down to collect my report
Hoping against hope
No luck - my platelet’s have gone down further
So hospital visit tomorrow again
Dread another day – No bets please this time ??

Doctors administer treatment ,
Hospitals give hope
Great treatment & better Hopes – not wonder this hospital gets so busy .
And I renew my hope ,
And anxiously hope and Bet Again !!

That more people will walk out ( Happy ) than those that walk in
That a young proud mother with happily take out her healthy chubby well packed infant
That the old couple will walk back to their Innova, hand in hand smiling at each other – like their teen age days
And of course , by blood platelets count bounces back above 150K mark
And this will happen, I Bet ! Double & Redouble it !!

Krish..
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Friday, October 8, 2010

Infant Jesus Church !

I often go the Infant Jesus Church in Vivek Nagar, Bangalore  .

2 reasons .

*        I like the environment – Calm, serene and peaceful . Well regulated traffic inside & widely spaced benches to sit on . Very unlike the noisy and somewhat crowded and chaotic popular south Indian temples .

*        I like the convenience – I can enter the church and walk right up to the Altar without removing my shoes and socks ! Unlike the temples where I would have to remove my S & S , wash my hands and feet,  cautiously walk over  hard stone &  prickly surface and negotiate the various water / oil  spills and the mashed prasad ( prasadam ) patches on the floor !!

I  buy a large bunch of candles , light them one by one , counting off the many groups of people on whose behalf I offer each candle – starting with myself, my family, my  relatives , my friends, all my bosses , my collegues in Bgl office , my collegues in GGN office , my other old collegues and friends abroad and elsewhere ! In fact – My Sarva Kutumba – my entire global family !!

Then I walk up to the main altar, look up at the Infant Jesus’ radiant face , walk around the small statue placed in front , put my offerings into the bin and walk back to the benches .

Many time I have tried to ask for favours – like … please help me meet my Quota , help me make a great plan / presentation , help me get over my incessant cold soon etc ..  But I never manage to get enough seriousness and focus into such pleas and then they  all invariably end up at the common denominator – pl give me good health , good sensibility . I am happy , so please  maintain my current level of happiness and nothing more , O God !! Not very ambitious  – but I have no reasons to complain .

Yesterday, after my usual routine I sat back on a bench near the Pew and observed the devotees ..

Very interesting …

A young couple came in – obviously Christian Catholic from their attire . Lit  2 candles murmured a short prayer, briskly walked up to the altar, quickly kissed the feet to infant Jesus statue , put an offering and walked out !

And old woman , pain reflecting on her face knelt in front of the statue , arms spead out  wide, eyes  closed , prayed for some time .  She got up,  hugged the statue, took off one the garlands and slowly trudged out !

Many more came in -  some   kneeled , prayed silently , others  touched the feet / kissed the feet , hugged Infant Jesus statue,  mentally asked for favours and left .

I could well imagine  their feelings and the  pain  and I felt extremely sober !

And then ..

A young lady walked in . In a bright mauve colored saree with a matching top . No Christian definitely - observing the red bindi on her forehead  and the faint streak of vibhuti ( sacred ash ) above it .

She quickly took of her sandals , pushed it to a corner , knelt in front of the statue , did a perfect hindu style pranaan ( 3 times ) , then walked up to Infant Jesus, touched his feet with her right hand and then passed it over her head , stood near the statue and prayed .  Wonder how she prayed ?? – may be the English prayer we  learnt at our Christian missionary school and /or the common sanskrit shlokas we all learn at our homes !!

Then she picked up a short strand of flower ,  walked past me , slipped on her sandals and left !!

And I watched her ,  very amused !

And as I was reflecting  on  this incident with the smile still on my face , a sudden wave of feeling unsettled me ! Why am I feeling lost suddenly .

Is Infant Jesus any different from   all the  other gods I worship ? 

Is this church any different than any of the other temple I visit as often ?

Then why do  I behave so different here ?

Why do I so confidently walk up to the main altar here with my shoes on, when I can never  imagine doing such a bizarre act  in any temple ??

I sat for long  .

I did not get an answer ..

Nor I am sure what I will do next time I come here ..

Krish..

Wednesday, October 6, 2010

Rajnikanth – He, who is a Phenomenon !!

The world has seen many super heros and villans.

          But Rajni beats them all  -  Hands down ! Pants down !!

And that too without wearing any fluorescent tights …..nor an underwear on top !!

Tarzan – the lord of the jungle – could not proceed beyond the trees !

Phanton – went ahead but did not have the staying power !

Superman . Batman, Spiderman can fight villans , climb walls, fly in the air – like all normal superheros & The Incredibles too !!

But Rjnikanth .. He is a Phenomenon . He can match all the superheros can do – without  batting  an eyelid !!!

And while Harry Potter’s Lord Voldemort can boast of the title  - He who must not be named ..

Our Rajni has a many  more under his belt !!! 

·                     He who can slam a revolving door !

·                     He who can fast forward a live TV relay !!

·                     He who can strangle you with a cordless phone !!!

·                     He who can delete the recycle bin !!!!

And of course most of you may have come across this great one ..

           Where there is a will  .

              There is a way …

                       And  Where there is Rajnikanth ..

                                    There is NO Way !!!

Check out for more @

http://www.goiit.com/posts/list/community-shelf-99-rajnikanth-jokes-1016995.htm

Krish..

Pink Tights & French Perfume !!

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I walk,
In the mornings mostly .
On plain clear roads ,  on not so busy parks and on less crowded jogging tracks .

I love fresh air ,
The morning mist ,
And the smell of chill wind,  fresh grass & damp mud .

And I dread ,
The passing draft of ,
And the snell of  sweat & body odor from passer-bys .

So I consciously ,
Keep a wide and safe distance ,
From any oncoming jogger or while overtaking a slow trotter .

Last week , a new dame in pink tights over took me –
Passed by me - a mere hair’s breath away .
And she left behind her wake,  the lovely aroma of a mild floral perfume !
( must be French , I bet !! )

My eyes lit up,
My ears switched off from the headphones ,
My mind did a somersault
And My legs walked faster –
All  Automatically !!

I caught up with her , a few feet behind and held the pace for a few seconds before I overtook her in close quarters mentally imagining what an intriguing person she might be .
But I did not dare to look back and check her out .

Pink Tights and French Perfume can be a fatal combination !!

Krish..
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Sunday, October 3, 2010

CWG 2010 - Do'nt Blame us !!

CWG NewDelhi 2010.

Do not blame us . We are not at fault !
Its statistics ! The dice were loaded against us all the way !!!

It has been proved that after every 2 spectacular events the chances of the third event delivering a " hattrick " is less than 2% !
More than 70 % chances that the third will turn into a non event and 28% chances of it turnig into a disaster .
So the CWG 2010 really did not have a chance - coming right after the Olympics and the Wrold Cup .
Why blame the Organising commitee, the Chairman and all the witch hunts ??

Accept the statistics , The Truth and we can all rest peacefully !!
And we are having a spectacular opening event right now !!
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Krish..
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Rich Girl will not obey our orders, Sir !!

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So Ramesh,  are you married ?
No Sir .
What are you waiting for ??
Pause – no answer ..
Do you have any sisters ?
Yes Sir ,     one ,     she is married .
Good , so its your turn next , no ??
Yes Sir , my parents are already looking .
Excellent Ramesh !!   Ask them to find you a rich girl !!
No Sir .
Why ?
Rich girl will not be good Sir .. We have experience Sir .
They are looking for poor girl only , Sir .
Why Ramesh, what is wrong with rich girls ?
Sir, Rich girl … we will want them to..  to obey ..
Rich girl will not obey our orders . Sir .
OK … and ??
Sir they will only want money and want to be happy .
Ramesh , is that not what all of us also want in life  ??
Not that Sir .  Poor girl will know lot more , she will know lot more house things  . She will be nice because she will know sadness also Sir !!

And that is how the conversation progressed and finally eliminated the prospects of any  rich girl marrying Ramesh , the taxi cab driver ( hailing from Tumkur ) who picked me up at Bgl airport and dropped  me @ my home last night ..

Krish..
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IndiBlogger Meet – Bgl, 3 Oct’10 !!

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I went in as a casual observer …
And got converted !!

A room full of bright young folks bubbling with energy and enthusiasm .
From 19 year olds to some wizened grey hairs  - they were all sharing their passion for blogging and twitter .

And I decided I must join this group rightaway !!

SO here I go on air !!

Krish..
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